Are you a Pushover?

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When people work together, there will be conflict. In a conflict, there are times when you can be too accommodating and if you are, you may be seen, not as a “nice guy” but rather a pushover. How can you avoid that?

While not all conflicts required giving and getting, if you know that you’re going to give in, decide in advance how much is the most that you will give. At the risk of stating the obvious, begin your negotiation at a point where this can be your fallback position…not the first thing you offer.

What do you want to get? Do you have an ideal target or aspiration of what you want to get? Be optimistic but not unrealistic. People do not expect to “win it all” so do not feel bad about asking for something in return. Remember: you deserve it!

Decide what is not negotiable. If something is truly non-negotiable, let people know what it is and why you won’t give in. Sometimes, simply by explaining the reason, the other person may learn something they had not considered and together you may come up with a mutually satisfying solution.

If negotiating is hard for you, start negotiating about something small until you build your confidence. Remember, a good negotiator wins respect. A pushover gets walked upon!

(From Negotiating Skills-Dr. Mimi Hull)

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